


I Never

by Ziocho



Category: Seduce Me (Visual Novel)
Genre: Drinking Games, F/M, Fluff, Gen, Humor, I Never, Pranks, reader POV, story time
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-07
Updated: 2017-08-07
Packaged: 2018-12-12 12:54:17
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,138
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11737473
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ziocho/pseuds/Ziocho
Summary: A drinking game with Carrie, Iridessa, Noryn, Twila, Erik, Sam, Matthew, and you!





	I Never

**Author's Note:**

> Oh god, this ended up being longer than a drabble. Uh… Happy birthday to myself? :’D Enjoy this silly story of some SM backer OCs and one time they teased the lovable Sam!
> 
> Everyone in this fic is 21+. Please drink responsibly!
> 
> Originally posted on my tumblr: http://ziocho.tumblr.com/post/148667875270/i-never

Erik cheekily proclaimed while swirling his drink in his souvenir glass from France, “I’ve never worn women’s lingerie,” knowing at least  _one_  of his brothers would be caught.

Across the living room table, Sam and Matthew sheepishly picked up their cups and gulped yet again in silence that was quickly broken by Iridessa’s disbelief. 

“Erik, you liar.” Iridessa threw the red incubus a knowing glance from her seat on the long couch. “There’s no way you haven’t!”

Erik’s lips curled into a smirk before he threw his shoulders up in a shrug. “It’s true.”

“Bullshit!”

You coughed, stifling your giggles from bubbling out of you. You recently had joined this strange family, and the girls decided that they should fill you in on the things they did, like dinners and parties, but most importantly right now are the pranks. “We’re changing that right now,” you decided. Noryn shook with gleeful agreement, suggesting to ‘toss him into a closet with a new pair of undies,’ to which Sam and Matthew obliged with evil grins.

“Wha–? Wait–!” Erik yelped as his brothers hooked their arms around him, picking him up and delivering him to his makeshift changing room down the hall.

“Pics or it didn’t happen!” Iridessa chirped, taking a victorious sip from her glass.

After the younger brothers settled back in the living room, presumably leaving Erik to change in privacy, Twila didn’t fail to notice that  _Sam_  drank to that last I Never.

“Sam, so… lingerie?” Twila teased.

“Carrie asked!”

“I asked as repayment for a crotch full of your hair!”

You desperately drank from your glass to hide your amusement as your eyes darted between the other women and Sam, the poor incubus as the center for their teasing.

Noryn piped up with contagious enthusiasm, “Was that the prank Matthew and I played on him?!” The sentence barely made it through her mouth before Matthew doubled over and clutched his sides, tears threatening to spill from his eyes as Noryn caught his infectious laughter.

Carrie cried out at the reminder, “Yes, oh my god! I still have the texts, too!” Her grin stretched across her face as Sam’s frown deepened.

Iri pressed her lips tight, hiding her giggles as she reminded Sam with a knowing look, “Listen for the ocean, idiot.”

The incubus scowled in retaliation, “How was I supposed to know?!”

The girls couldn’t hold in their laughter, guffawing when Sam gruffly took a swig of his drink. You threw a pleading glance at Twila, hopefully so she can fill you in on this story but she was clutching her sides as well, shooting you an apologetic look through her grin.

You tried again with Noryn, waiting patiently and silently asking for the details. The giggly source of sunshine rubbed at the tears in her eyes before managing a slew of words in your direction, “One day, Matthew came up with this idea, like he went up to Crabcakes here and told him, ‘If you press your ear against a vagina, you can hear the ocean.’”

Sam grumbled, “Seriously, what the fuck? That’s not a thing, you fucking idiot,” directed to Matthew who was too occupied in his chuckles to retort. 

The lovely witch sitting near him poked his tense shoulder, “Mmhm, you said something like that to his face, too. Then something about ‘the little shit’ saying to you, ‘No, you know how seashells do it? It’s similar. Just try it,’” Carrie seemed to recite.

Your face quirked at the sound of that. Seashells? The cooch? Judging by the indignation in Sam’s body language, a scowl on his face and his arms crossed, it looked like he knew that it was a hoax from the start.

Noryn beamed, cheerfully recalling with Sam. “Remember when you came to me and asked ‘ _Hey, is it true that vajs sound like the ocean?’_ I couldn’t tell if you were fucking with me or not with a question like that!”

He growled, “God, you’re just like Matthew! You just looked at me and said ‘ _You never tried it?’_ like I should’ve!” Noryn squealed in giggles, delighted in Sam’s impression of her and throwing her hand up to high-five the younger brother.

You’ve never seen Sam flustered from embarrassment before. His face was so bright, you can nearly  _hear_  the heat that’s coming from him, which didn’t help your urge to find a ripe tomato to compare its color to his loud blushing. 

“Oh my god,” Sam sighed, hiding his face and resigned to the girls continuing the tale.

“What happened next?” you eked out, curiosity making you impatient.

Carrie piped up, flashing an adoring smile to Sam before turning to you. “So one night after Sam went down on me, he just  _pressed_ his ear against my vulva _.”_

Matthew and Twila  _shrieked_  in surprised laughter, hearing  _this_  detail for the first time. The blue-eyed incubus cried, “You did that, Sam?! I can’t believe–!”

Carrie picked up right after, “Mhm! I asked him  _what the hell,_  cause let me tell you, feeling hair that’s not yours down there is  _alarming_. He then picked his head up and looked at me with these dumb leaf green eyes and told me…”

She leaned in, doing her best impression of Sam with a hushed voice.  _“L-Listening for the ocean, babe.”_

To that image, you bursted in a fit of laughs, picturing the inanity.

“Not once, but  _twice_ ,“ Carrie sighed with a small smile.

Noryn nodded, “Mmm yup! Sam called me the next day and it went like:

> _Noryn: “Wha-? Matthew told you that?"_
> 
> _Sam: "Yeah! I should’ve known he was punkin me"_
> 
> _Noryn: "What an ass. He didn’t even tell you that you’re supposed to cup your hands around her."_
> 
> _Sam: "What??”_
> 
> _Noryn: “Like listening through walls and doors? Come on, Sam."_
> 
> _Sam: "That sounds stupid."_
> 
> _Noryn: "Whatever lol. Do what you want, haha"_

… so that second time was me, bahaha!”

Carrie puffed out her cheeks, locking Noryn in the crook of her elbow as the two girls squirmed in elated wrestling as the others were overcome with side-splitting glee that the green incubus not once but  _two times_  listened for the ocean in Carrie’s cooch.

Sam buried his face in his hands in grumbles and muttered to the universe, “Please end this.”

As if by divine prayer and wish granting, Erik emerged and made his entrance to the living room, sporting delicate lacy underwear that was a size too tight so it clung to his features. His bashful blush and the silence of eyes looking at Erik effectively swept Sam’s little adventure off the table.

“Whose turn is it now?” Erik shyly settled back onto the loveseat, ready to gulp down the rest of his drink from his French glass.

You knew that this would be an unforgettable night, alcohol or not.


End file.
